Journey? OR Destination?

It was barely a couple of months ago that ASid officially entered the halls of Teendom! That's supposed to be challenging enough for him; I have been there and somewhat remember that time. But I was a girl and he is a boy, and perhaps I don't know what he is actually going through?!

While he is going through this personal transition, there are other changes happening as well. There are choices he is being asked to make. Apparently, Grade 8 students can apply to specialized High School programs within the TDSB. ‎There is cutthroat competition for this handful of programs. 12 and 13 year old kids are being asked to write their personal profiles, list all activities they are involved in and write entrance tests!

Most parents, I am sure, would like to believe their kids can achieve anything...I am one of them. I have complete faith in my children; I believe they will achieve if they are interested. ASid is interested in these specialized programs as he has always been quite academic. So, I have been gathering information and getting my firstborn to fill out applications and do some introspection. Who is he and why should these programs be interested in him?

I have told him quite clearly that I will be fine if he does not get into any of these programs. As a parent, I got on board quite late. There are parents who have been grooming their children for months, if not years to prepare for these entrance tests. I have realistically set up expectations and support my child. To me, the journey is of utmost importance. By participating in the application process, my child can learn many skills. If he gets accepted into a program, it then becomes the proverbial cherry on the top!

At this point in time, ASid has gone through one application process. He is preparing for the next one. The date for the entrance test clashes with the date of Hans' first dance recital. Craigley and I need to divide and conquer. I asked him to take ASid while I took responsibility of Hans. All Craigley told our son was that he would only get involved if ASid was serious about the entrance test. For Craigley, the destination is important; one must prepare well to reach one's destination!

Poor ASid! Such mixed messages from his parents. But he is learning; he is learning that every person he meets in his lifetime will have different expectations of him. ASid will not meet all expectations...eventually he will start taking detours to get to his destination or take a different path and set a new destination. He has a choice and I hope I have made that abundantly clear to him. All the best kid. You are not alone.
 

When it rains, it pours!

I had been so full of self-doubt the last few months as I embarked on the journey to find a job. There were days I was tough on myself and there were days I felt sorry for myself. I found support in strangers and lost faith in loved ones. There was a bit of paranoia that people were judging me and perhaps pitying me?! Mostly, I didn't want to let down my boys.

I remember going for my one and only one interview. I was in a taxi on the way there. Usually, I walk or take the TTC. That day, I didn't want to arrive huffing and puffing to the interview. It worked out well that it wasn't too far from my home. As I got in, I couldn't help but let the taxi driver ‎know that I was going for a job interview. I shared with him about being a stay-at-home mom for over 12 years and how nervous I was about the interview! As I left the taxi, the driver remarked, "It is not the end of the world!” It was sweet and ironic at the same time as I say that to my boys almost always. I was grateful for the reminder that day.

‎And hopefully, I will never forget it. Today, as I am remembering that moment, I am also hoping the boys will never forget it. Sometimes, we lose perspective of what is important. Jobs will come and jobs will go. Time is not made that way. Right now, I have jobs scheduled here and there. I don't have a full-time job and yet, I am so busy. It does pour when it rains...and I will enjoy these blessings from the skies.