A Strange Follow-Up: Karmic Karma?!

Where do I begin?!

Perhaps, I shouldn't have been so unkind to a senior citizen in my last post?!

Yesterday, I walked by a house that's being constructed. The door opened and 2 people walked out - a man and a woman. I was walking with Hans, and so I ‎did the friendly thing and said hello to the duo. I congratulated them on their purchase and complimented them on the nice looking home they are building for themselves in our neighbourhood.

Then, I did the neighbourly thing and gushed about the schools and how good they are. I brought up Hans' school and asked if they had any children?! I saw the woman look at me strangely, and then the man said that she was his child!!

Oh no! I mistook a father-daughter to be husband-wife!! The woman looked so flabbergasted and all I could do was stare speechlessly as ‎they got into a car and drove away. It almost seemed like they couldn't get away from me fast enough!!

I did not even apologize. Where were my manners?!

On that note...Dear senior-citizen-at-the-movies, please forgive me for thinking you were lacking in manners. Perhaps you were speechless as well?! I would like to give you the benefit of the doubt.

And dear young-woman-at-the-house-being-constructed-in-our-neighbourhood, the chances of you stumbling across this blog are close to zero OR simply zero! However, I may actually run into you again...and when I do, I will surely apologize and hope you will forgive me for making you a mother and inquiring about your nonexistent children.

Hope this karma thing stops here. I have learned my lesson. Next time someone mistakes me for a grandma...‎I will let it go and not write a rambling post!

 

Going Going...GREY?!

I don't think I am a funny person. So the idea of writing something funny for my friend KPF every year for his birthday is almost out of character for me. But I will continue to do so and someday, I might actually get him to chuckle a bit!

Last time I saw KPF was on Canada Day and when I did, it was about 4 or 5 years from the previous last time. So, obviously, there were some changes. And I have no filter when it comes to friends...

‎I think I said something like, "You have grey hair!!"

This is from a woman whose hair has been going grey since her early Twenties! Compared to me, KPF looks fabulous. Happy 42nd my friend!! You are aging nicely.

I may not entirely believe in religion, but I do believe in the concept of Karma.

So, how did the grey hair remark come back to me?! I was at the movies with Craigley's sister-in-law (his brother's wife); both of us were hanging out with our 7 year Olds. An elderly lady sat herself beside us. She looked at Craigley's sister-in-law and said, "You have 2 lovely and well behaved children". I didn't mind not being acknowledged as my child's mother. I'd rather not be acknowledged than mistaken for the nanny! Then the most unexpected thing happened; this elderly lady looked at me and asked, "You must be the grandmother?"

I wished she had mistaken me for the nanny! I really wanted to say, "No, I am the nanny." But then I let her know that I am the mother of the lovely 7 year old boy. To my surprise, she did not even apologize! Talk about senior citizens and their manners!

Well, I am over it now. It is better to laugh it off than cry about it.

Craigley's sister-in-law is 7 or 8 years older than I am, however my hair is greyer than hers! So, that was it? The amount of grey in one's hair is still an indicator of one's age?... Maybe I am beginning to look like a grandmother?... Is it time to dye my hair and dab some makeup on?!...Perhaps the elderly lady's eyesight is not as good as it used to be?!

‎Wow! One remark can unleash such paranoia! I don't know how comedians do self-deprecating humour?! But it must be therapeutic in some way or people wouldn't indulge in it. Having said that, seriously, who cares?!

Have a good one KPF!

Note: Where is the token lesson in this post, you ask? Here it is: Forget about what strangers say or do; they don’t know you! And don’t forget to be kind to your friends…they will be with you through the black, blond, brown, red, blue, pink, purple and even grey!

 

First Day...again!

Summer flew by and it is already the first day of another school year. Always‎ a day of mixed emotions for me! I am handling it better with each year; fewer “water works” for sure!

I have 2 choice quotes from the boys that describe where they are in terms of their mental age.

ASid is 14 and has definitely shown the proverbial teenage attitude. Here is how he feels these days - I didn't choose to be born; you chose to have children!

Hans is 7; literally half his brother's age. His communication mainly revolves around "gases" and he can laugh uncontrollably if someone brings up "gases". Here is his most profound utterance - If I have some burps and farts, I ‎can eat some more...my tummy is too full now!

I am gonna miss my boys‎, but good to know that they are on their way.

Here is how I know. Following are a few words a parent sent me last night:

You know when I was talking to (ASid) the other day, I couldn’t help smiling during our conversation, because I felt so happy for you and for him as well. I felt happy for you, because (ASid) really impressed me in many ways…

This parent wanted ASid’s advice for her nephew who is starting Junior High this year. ASid actually took the time out to talk to this parent. She works at SickKids and she deals with the brain in particular…if ASid impressed her, then he is alright! And his brother must be alright too!

Note: I do not need an endorsement to know that my boys are OK; but it doesn’t hurt to receive one!

 

Unleashing Messy Boys on Unsuspecting Neat Girls!

I rarely complain about my boys to anyone. They are not perfect, but there isn't much to complain about. One of the few times I did, I was told that it is my fault!

It was perhaps 2 or 3 years ago, I was chatting with Hans' Art teacher. I think I was ‎trying to let her know why I hadn't invited her to my home for a cup of tea?! I told her how I have a messy home as I have 2 boys and their stuff is everywhere. To which, she did not bat an eyelid and spoke in a matter of fact tone that it was my fault that I did not teach them cleanliness!!

It was like a slap in my stay-at-home mom face. OK! Bit of a hyperbole there, but I tend to take anything related to my "momleying" very personally!‎ When I mentioned the conversation to my mom, she said in the same matter of fact tone that "truth hurts"! WOW! A second slap in my stay-at-home face! This one was more painful.

I looked at my figurative red face in a figurative mirror and realized that both the women did not say anything that is not true. I am so used to cleaning up after the boys that if I couldn't, the messiness increases exponentially!! I believe I told myself that "a messy home is a happy home" and the mantra worked for me for the most part. I only felt some feelings of embarrassment when I had adult company at my home. Otherwise, it is the most welcoming home to kids and teenagers alike.

Fast forwarding to now, I am tired of feeling embarrassed and ‎making excuses for the boys. Therefore, I got tough last week. Clean up or no more play dates!! It was/is a lot of work. I can actually see the floor in ASid's room. He appreciated the change. In fact, he exclaimed something like, "Momley, we only found dust bunnies in my room! Some of my friends actually eat and drink in their rooms! Their rooms must be even harder to clean!" Yes, that made me feel a bit better. I have a "no eat/drink in bedroom" policy. So I did something right. The fact that ASid could imagine a worse situation than he put himself in and reflect upon it is a good sign. However, it would be so much nicer if he can imagine a better situation than he was in, and strive for it…at least, he is on his way…he will get there! I have faith.

A very long time ago, my friend P and I were pregnant with our firstborns. I had a boy and she had a girl; they were 36 days apart. As a mother of a girl child, P's only concern was that the boy her daughter will eventually settle down with won't be a spoilt little brat‎! I hope not! On that note, I wouldn't want some girl in the future telling me that I have raised messy boys. Well, there is damage control underway.

I will not be guilty of unleashing messy boys on unsuspecting neat girls!