Main or Nothing!

The reason "The Wizard of Oz" keeps coming up is that Hans is enrolled in an after school drama program, and ‎that's the script they are working with!

Yesterday were auditions. In preparation, we got to fill out a very professional audition form. We had to list what roles Hans wanted to audition for. Hans really wants to be the Scarecrow; however, I had to give him a reality check. The drama program has kids from JK to Grade 6. "The Wizard of Oz" is very popular, it appears, amongst older girls. So, there are several girls from Grades 3 to 6 who are vying for the role of Dorothy. There is only 1 Dorothy and the rest may end up with the other main roles including the Scarecrow! Hans is in Grade 2 and most likely, he will be cast as a Munchkin!

Hans was not happy with my reality check. He said he'd rather be the dog Toto than a Munchkin! I felt bad and let him list both the Scarecrow and Toto as 2 roles he is interested in. Then, I asked him if he would like to add any other role. He thought for a while and said, "Glinda, the good witch!". I was a little surprised, but then I knew why! When I was a little girl and I had to pick a role, I would always go for the fairy godmother or the good witch‎. I never did care to be the princess… My little guy is honouring his Momley's legacy!

So, yesterday were the auditions. Parents aren't allowed in and I only got to talk with Hans at pickup. I asked him about his audition and how he felt about it. ‎He proudly revealed that he auditioned for the role of Dorothy! He said he was only one of 2 students to sing "Somewhere over the Rainbow" without looking at a sheet of lyrics. I looked at him like he has gone crazy. What would possess him to audition for the role of Dorothy? I didn't ask him, but it dawned on me slowly… Hans would rather be the princess than the fairy godmother!

When ASid heard about Hans' audition, this is all he said, "That takes guts!". Yes it does! Even when Hans knew the probability of bagging the lead role was close to a zero, he went for it anyways. He may be asked to be one of the Munchkins when the roles are announced next week, and he will give it his all; but at the same time, he let everyone know what role he’d rather play! Way to go kid.

Addendum:

So, Hans is not Dorothy! But then Hans is also not a Munchkin! Hans is neither Toto ‎nor Glinda! So, what part did he get? He got 2 roles that I don't remember from the movie - Jean Pierre and Roi. They are supposed to be workers in the Emerald City.

Well, Hans and I are viewing videos on YouTube ‎that attempt to teach people about speaking with a French accent. We are hoping Hans can do Jean Pierre in a French accent and Roi in a regular "Canadian accent". No role is too small even for the littlest of actors, but a role can be made significant by putting an effort into it. Dorothy will be remembered anyways, but wouldn't it be nice if Jean Pierre was remembered as well?! That's our goal and Hans is on his way. Will keep you posted!

 

Value of Time

Hans has a dance class on Thursdays from 4:30 to 5:30 pm. Last Thursday, we got there about 20 minutes early. While Craigley, Hans and I were waiting in the car, a Dad with 2 daughters arrived and parked beside us and got out. Hans wanted to get out of the car as well and hang out with the girls. So, Hans and I got out; however Craigley decided to wait in the car.

The 3 kids started running around and they didn't care that there was still a 15 minute wait! This Dad, the other parent, asked if he could leave his daughters with me. I responded in the affirmative and he took off! Craigley threw his arms up in the air in the car and looked like he was ready to take off as well! What a predicament!

When we got home, Craigley decided to give me a lecture on the value of my time. Craigley enjoys giving lectures. His lectures last several minutes and since this is a post on the value of time, I will summarize in a couple of sentences. Craigley was frustrated that I wasn't the parent who left her child with the other parent and bought us 15 minutes of time. Instead I was the parent who spent 15 minutes of her time!

I wasn't sorry about helping another parent; I would do it again! However, I sincerely apologized to Craigley for making him wait. My solution was to perhaps arrive on time and not be there too early?! That way, I don't have to put myself in a situation where others are taking advantage of my time!! Craigley felt like that is not the solution. He simply wanted me to be aware of the value of my time next time...translate that to "leave Hans with the other parent and leave"! I couldn't provide a guarantee of that happening right away; I am a slow learner.

Anyways, I decided to share this incident with ASid. There are always lessons to be learned even from his parents' disagreeing about things in general. ASid listened to everything and this is what he had to say...at least, I will try to capture his ‎perspective on the incident as accurately as possible.

ASid remembered something Craigley told him many moons ago, "Nothing in Life is free". Given that, ASid told me that I did not spend my time for nothing! He actually assured me that the 15 minutes I spent taking care of the 2 girls bought me the other parent's goodwill. ASid figured that I would be paid in some format in the future...it could be a ride I need or something else. Value of my time can be measured in many ways!

I know I brought up the lack of a frontal lobe in teenagers in a couple of posts, but I must confess that I was impressed with my first born!‎ Some days, he is brilliant!

 

Who is Momley?

Welcome to the 100th post! Feels a bit unreal and at the same time, feels really good. Almost 4 years since the moment I posted "Hello World!"‎ And I am still here. Thanks to KPF, Smoggy, Sir B and my wonderful brother! I haven't been exactly consistent with my writing, but you have been super consistent with your support! Thank you.

It feels like the right time to write a bit of a reflective post. So, here goes...

Who is Momley?

Momley's parents married for love against their own respective parents' wishes. Momley is their first born. Her given name roughly translates to "sweet" and Momley tries to live up to the name her parents gave her.

Momley has a younger brother who arrived about 20 months after she did. However, he has grown up to be as protective as an older brother and as indulging as a grandparent.

‎Momley fell in love when she was 15/16 with a boy who wanted to be a Captain in Navy. She fancied herself Maria and this boy was her Captain Von Trapp. Then, at 18, Momley's family moved to Canada. Momley stayed in touch with the boy; wrote several letters and visited him twice. On the second visit, this boy said "So Long! Farewell!" His contention was that Momley has become fat. Sigh! Momley was heartbroken at 21/22 and cried herself to sleep for about 3 months.

One day, she woke up and decided to do something totally different. That's when she met Craigley, KPF and Smoggy...not in that alphabetical order and not all at once.

Smoggy is Momley's best friend. He likes to call her Pookie. Some people wonder why Momley didn't marry Smoggy, but that's a story for another time! Momley turns to Smoggy when she is confused and emotional. There was this time a few years ago when the boy who dumped Momley came back into her Life. Smoggy told Momley to thank this boy-turned-man for‎ letting her go; if he hadn't, then Pookie would never have met Smoggy! Bloody brilliant, eh? So, Momley is friends with the bloke who made her cry for 3 months and once in a while, she offers a virtual shoulder for him to cry on! Smoggy makes Momley a better person than she is sometimes.

Then, there is KPF! ‎Momley has said quite a bit about KPF. What else can be said? Here is a friendly warning from Smoggy to Momley that captures the importance of KPF - "Make sure you come back with both your lungs after you see him!" It is true that Momley would give a lung to KPF happily. Why a lung? Oh well, that's another story for another time.

Lastly, there is Craigley! Craigley pursued Momley till she agreed to marry him. Momley had plans to adopt orphans and be the next Mother Teresa; instead she married Craigley and has added two more human beings to our planet.

Momley chose to be a stay-at-home mom to combat, with her nurturing, all sorts of genetic predisposition her children may have inherited. There are a few family members who set off alarms even upon the very first meeting. It is frightening to acknowledge that Momley's children share genetic material with them. It is even more scary to imagine her children morphing into these family members! So, she'd rather be with her children against all well-meaning family, friendly and financial advice.

Momley doesn't care about what people think about her most of the times. She is usually a positive person. And she truly believes her children are destined to do great things in Life!

More about Momley in the 200th post...when she gets there!

 

A Good Time to Die!

Since Hans is obsessed with Death these days, we have a few conversations about it.

One night, before Hans drifted off to sleep, he shared that his worst nightmare is‎ about him dying! I am quite sure he didn't mean it in a literal sense as in he has this recurring nightmare or anything like that! Most likely, it is something he thinks about and worries about! He wanted to know what mine is. In keeping up with the theme, I told him that I am afraid of dying before the boys stop needing me! Huh?! I had to explain - I'd like to live for as long as ASid and Hans need me. There was a pause and this is what Hans said, "Mom, I will need you forever so you never die!" What a sweet thing to say!

Honestly though, when is it a good time to die?

My maternal grandmother ‎once told me that she would probably die before I got married. So, I told her laughingly that she would see my first born and then, die. She didn't really get to see ASid in person; she saw a picture of ASid and then, a few days later, passed away! I almost felt responsible for her death! It is one of those tragic-comic moments.

I guess there is no good time to die. It is not like we get to choose. So, I told Hans to enjoy his life as life is too short. He looked at me and said, "That's not true! It is taking me forever to grow up!"‎ I can't win with this kid!

On a related note...the other day, we watched The Wizard of Oz and Hans wanted to know if the actress who played Dorothy was still alive or dead?! I told him she died a long time ago. Hans pondered over it for a few seconds and then, he exclaimed, "But she lives forever in this movie!" Wow, quite a deduction by a 7 year old!

Now, Hans is on a mission to star in a blockbuster movie so he can live forever. Hopefully, this mission puts his worst nightmare to sleep.

 

Seeking help for someone else!

I don't drive as I can't drive. ‎What a situation - a stay-at-home-mom who can't drive! So, I rely on walking and taking the TTC. I might have mentioned this in a previous post. I mention this again as I am about to disclose one other imperfection of Momley! It is more like a bad habit...although I don't drive, I am very good at volunteering people who drive to help those who can't!

I am almost always volunteering Craigley to pick up or drop off acquaintances, friends and family including the boys. It is really the only favour I ask from Craigley. I have been known to make such statements as "If I could drive, I wouldn't need Craigley at all!". It is true that money is important for a woman's independence; however driving provides even more independence. So, why don't I get that driver's license along with a job? Sigh! I am a work in progress and I will get there one of these days. That's yet another story for another day.

Moving along...

2 days ago, ASid had an after school meeting with Sir B to work on an ISP (Independent Study Project) that involved making a video. That day was also a snowy and cold day with wind gusts that made it even colder for people walking or taking the TTC. ASid did not want to postpone the meeting to another day. He was fine with the cold. The boys' response to my concerns about the cold weather is almost always ‎the same, "Don't worry Momley! We are Canadian!"...as opposed to their immigrant mother! I object to that, but I digress.

Back to the first moment of 2016 worth writing about‎...

I felt bad for ASid that he has to take the TTC after his meeting with Sir B. So, I asked Craigley if we could boot over from Hans' piano lesson which ends at 5:30 pm to pick up ASid at 6:30 pm. We could easily wait around a coffee shop and it is also an opportunity to see Sir B! So, we got to a Tim Horton's close to where the meeting was taking place and settled ourselves in. At exactly 6:30 pm, Craigley wanted to know where ASid was?! I decided to give him 10 extra minutes. Craigley wanted me to call and find out what was happening. So, I did call our first born and found out that it could take him till 7:30 pm. I was like take your time and Craigley was like we are leaving right now! The one who drives the car is all mighty and powerful. So, we left. Poor Sir B had the responsibility of walking ASid to the nearest TTC station after they finished working on the ISP. ASid eventually got home a little after 8 pm.

‎I felt bad for ASid who literally had a 12 hour day with school and after school work. He is only 14. I actually apologized to him for taking off on him. He is a good kid. He told me to not worry so much. He actually assured me that he would ask for help if he needs it. I hope so!

An important lesson ASid got to learn is to give himself some extra ‎time when someone offers to pick him up. It would probably have been better if he had said 7/7:30ish instead of 6:30 pm. Waiting requires patience. If a parent can get tired of waiting for a child, then it is best for the child to come up with smart solutions to work with that parent...or anyone else for that matter!

What did I learn from this moment in my Momley life? That I should only offer a ride to someone when I am able to drive a vehicle and follow through!‎ Otherwise, it is best to remain quiet. Seeking help from someone to help someone else works best if it is an emergency situation and one needs to dial 911. Other than that, there are no guarantees.

Here is wishing patience to all of us, and mostly for one of us. Happy 2016 everyone!

Addendum:

2 days after the first meeting with Sir B, ASid had a second meeting. I completely stayed out of it and all went well.

On a somewhat related note, I sometimes get this feeling that Craigley is secretly reading this blog…or maybe it is just sheer coincidence... couple of days after the above post, Craigley said something that could be precisely summarized as follows: I am only good for driving people around!

...and the drama continues...