In terms of health, I am probably doing better than what I captured in a melodramatic post from a couple of months ago. I did see a specialist twice and the official diagnosis is Palindromic Rheumatism which is not as bad as Rheumatoid Arthritis. For that, I am thankful.
In terms of mental health, I feel like I am losing it some days. The pandemic has definitely added a bit of anxiety and paranoia to my active imagination which will take more than a few days to get back to “normal”!
I guess that means I am alive and well and mostly in good health and good spirits.
Before I wrap up, I just feel like sharing a moment I had with Lady A. She mentioned something about chickens that she has. She has mentioned them before; but if I don’t actually see them, it is difficult to remember something said in passing. Lady A mentioned that she gets brown eggs from her brown/red chickens and white eggs from her white chickens. We had a lengthy discussion about that by drawing parallels to race and the current conversation the world is engaged in. For some reason, I had this one question on my mind that I couldn’t wait to ask Lady A: “So you must have a rooster too?” I just assumed that a chicken needed a rooster to produce eggs!
Lady A looked at me like I had gone mad before she calmly said, “That is such a dumbass question!”
It was! I did feel dumb. Lady A quickly reminded me that my one dumb question is not a reflection of my overall general intelligence. I just wasn’t thinking!
Of all my conversations with Lady A, this is the one that will stand out. The next day, Lady A sent me a text about “feeling like an idiot” when chatting with her daughter about some trendy drink. I let her know that it was OK.
As we age, we may feel less informed than our kids. We may feel left out or left behind. We may even feel dumb at times. We just need to remind ourselves that it is OK. It is not the end of the world!
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