Virtual Offers and Acceptances

A few weeks ago, the Toronto District School Board (TDSB) sent an email to all Occasional Teachers (OTs) to apply for online contract teaching positions at their Virtual Schools. I did not respond as the TDSB hires based on seniority and I am at the bottom of that list as supposedly there are 3000+ OTs floating around Toronto. I have been an OT only since January 2019.

 

Then, on Sunday, Sep 20th, I logged into my TDSB email account to find an email requesting OTs to show their interest in an online teaching opportunity … again! The deadline to respond was set for 4 pm on Sep 20th and the email had been sent the day before, on Saturday, Sep 19th at 12:24 pm. Wow! Business being conducted on a weekend! That reeked of desperation and I decided to apply this time!

 

The email clearly stated the following:

 

"- email offers will start immediately and will conclude on Wednesday, September 23, 2020 at 6:00 PM."

 

That day and time, came and went. I spent a disappointed Thursday wallowing in self-pity. I decided to accept a supply teaching opportunity for Friday and get back to actually working instead of waiting for work. As I logged onto my computer, I found a job offer waiting for me from the TDSB that clearly stated that an "intent to accept or decline this offer via the google link below no later than September 25, 2020 at 12 Noon." That email was sent the night before at 10:47 pm.

 

Obviously, I accepted the offer. I haven't heard anything else from the TDSB since then! This almost feels like "fake news". It is weird not to have any "human contact" - there wasn't even a name on the Google Doc I was sent. All I was required to do was accept or decline by clicking into one of the options provided, and enter my TDSB employee number.

 

This has been one of the strangest experiences of my life. Part of me wants to celebrate and part of me is not so sure!

 

I have decided to wait for a day or two or more … 

 

With friends like these ...

Hans has started watching Friends' reruns lately.

 

Last night, I mentioned to him that we could look at people we know and place them in 1 of the 6 "Friend Types". He immediately wondered what type I was?! I told him that I cannot relate to any of the Friends. His prompt response was a question - "Because they are all good looking?"

 

That hurt a bit, but I retaliated just as swiftly!

 

"Well, I will let you know that I had many admirers!"

 

His comeback, "So people from your country like chubby girls!"

 

"Let me tell you that even in Canada, I had men from various racial and cultural backgrounds interested in me!"

 

His retort, "And you married dad!"

 

I expected Hans to say something about how nice and kind a person I am and that people would naturally be interested in me! But he was like "I am telling you the truth mom!"

 

Where has my sweet boy gone?

 

Before he went to bed, Hans said the following to me:

 

“No one cares about who you are. People only care about how you look. Welcome to the 2000s. Everyone is a bully.”

 

At the end of the day, after Hans reflected on our conversation and came up with that (as an apology or an explanation), it is a sad world my boy lives in.

 

NOT "same old same old"

Today was Hans' first day back to school. I decided to walk with him - I told him it was more for me than for him! So, we did walk together this morning. After he came back home, Hans casually mentioned that he was the loser who walked to school with his mom! That hurt! I quickly asked him if it would have been OK if I had driven him to school?! I only got silence in response.

What's with some kids who don't want to be seen with their parents in the open?!

Last week, Craigley, Hans and I dropped off ASid at Mary's residence. Prior to the drop-off, ASid and I had an argument and I declared that I should stay home, and he could go with his dad and brother. After a bit of silence, followed by a brief exchange of words, ASid insisted that I accompany him. I am glad he did. The 2 of us got to do some grocery shopping after many months and it was a pleasant ride with the 4 of us together. I was also happy to see Mary. She brought back edible gifts for the family from her home country and she was waiting to hand them to me. If I had chosen to stay home in anger and self-pity, I would have missed making some precious memories.

ASid is 19 and still a teenager in some ways, but he seemed to have developed a desire to make me part of his life. Hans is 12 and I guess he is at that age where he wants to break free from the maternal strings attached to him.

If I have learned anything from the pandemic, it is to count my blessings. The boys will go through their own emotional ups and downs while I am going through mine. I must not take words said in the heat of the moment too personally and I must definitely not dwell on one word so it could ruin an entire day!

Manufactured Intelligence

I recently told ASid that I am proud of him for being an independent student and achieving his academic success on his own.

 

Obviously, as parents, Craigley and I made some choices for ASid initially. We chose early French Immersion for him before he turned 5. We also decided to transfer to a French school board for Grade 4, but we moved him back to the TDSB in Grade 5 when he made the request.

 

We never had to help him with homework or prep him for tests. All his failures and successes are his own. We also spent very little money on the boy. The most was for his piano lessons at Yamaha which were very reasonable.

 

ASid will be starting 2nd year of university next week.

 

When I look back on the last 19 years with ASid, I would have to honestly admit that the boy didn’t really need us for school work; however, he recently confided that he needed us on an emotional level and he was glad that we were there for him. By “we”, he meant his family and extended family that includes my parents and my brother.

 

Recently, 2 kids I know are being lauded for their own academic achievements - one was ranked number 1 in a nationwide Math test and the other did well on his SSAT and got accepted into a prestigious program for Grade 7. I was happy for the parents and the children. Then, I also thought about the individual journeys of the 2 kids. The first one is an only child who has had tutors for almost every subject taught at school. Instead of spending money on a private school, his parents spend money on tutors. The second one has a competitive personality. He also has tutors as well as a private school education. It would be tragic if the 2 kids didn’t do well given the advantage their parents’ involvement and wealth provides!

 

In all fairness, some kids fail even with all the support in the world. The kids that do make it with all the support in the world - do they understand and appreciate what they have?

 

Not all of us have the same advantages. I could neither imagine nor afford a private school education for ASid or Hans; however, I searched for the “best” within the public school system and moved into an affluent neighbourhood and took on a superior mortgage! ASid opted to go to a high school with an hour and a half commute, each way, from our home. The neighbourhood eventually played an insignificant role in his academic journey.

 

I guess we lucked out with ASid. I wonder how we will do with Hans?! So far, the boy has been independent with his school work. He got his first C on his last report card. Do I get him a French tutor or do I let him own his failures and successes?! Hans is heading into Grade 7 - an important year where his report card needs to be pristine if he wants to apply to the handful of specialized high school programs that are available to all students within the TDSB.

 

For now, I will leave it to the boy and wait for him to ask for help if he needs it. Of course, I will offer help as necessary.

 

A few years ago, I heard a woman exclaim how intelligent her husband was. Her mother-in-law quietly retorted that the former had no idea how much money was spent on making her husband that intelligent!