It is just a job!

After my last interview failed to materialize into a job offer, I decided to simply continue to be a supply teacher. Then unexpectedly a principal reached out to me to apply for a job posting at her school. She got my name from a principal who was kind enough to get my permission to share my contact info with her. So, I applied for the job on Thursday. I had the interview on Friday, and I got the job offer on Monday. My first day of work was 2 days ago. I have a 3-year contract position at this small school in Scarborough.

After almost 6 years of supply teaching with a few short-term teaching assignments thrown in there, this is big. It is big because the last time I had something like this was 23 years ago, and on some days, it felt like I would never get it back. Now, even when I have what I thought of as elusive, all I can think of is that nothing has changed. I will still be showing up for work like I usually do, I will just get paid on a consistent basis.

All the introspection made me think of what Smoggie told me once - it is just a job! In some ways, it is. I am replaceable. However, most days, I feel indispensable. And I guess, that’s how we get through life … at least some of us! If we don’t feel somewhat important about what we do, then what’s it all about?

While I continue to mull over my ‘new’ job and give myself undue value, I can’t help but think of all the people who have supported me in getting to this point. I am so thankful to have them in my life. They know who they are. Happy Thanksgiving to them and to everyone.

There will be good days.

Three Free Meals

A while ago, I was at a restaurant for some take-out and saw a young man in the corner. He was simply standing there. It didn't seem like he was buying food. So, I asked the cashier if I could buy a meal for the young man. The cashier said that he would provide a meal for the young man at the end of the day. So, I asked the young man directly if he wanted a meal. He nodded affirmatively. I let him choose what he wanted and paid for it. He was very appreciative and started eating right away. When I got home, and narrated the incident to Hans, he exclaimed, "Mom, you saved his life!". I responded with, "I bought him one meal of his life.". That was what it was.

A few weeks later, I was getting out of a subway station and ran into a man. This man wondered if I could buy him a sandwich as he was hungry and he had just enough money to buy a bus ticket. I thought why not! I had $15, but the sandwich and a drink cost more. I ended up using my debit card. The man thanked me and as I was leaving, he said, "I need $15 for my bus ticket.". I was a little dismayed, and literally ran out of the shop. The man tried to follow, and I told him to not forget his drink. He ran back for his drink, and I escaped. That was a little scary.

Today, I was at the Court House for Jury Duty. At lunch, we were told we could leave the room and even the building. I decided to check out the cafeteria in the basement and stay within the building. As I got to the entrance to the cafe, a man came out and wondered if I could buy him a sandwich. He was one of the potential jurors and looked rather raggedy. I guess I have a need to buy food/sandwiches for random men! So, I bought him what he wanted - a cheeseburger. I had to endure some conversation while we waited for the burger to be made and for me to make the payment. The man said he would want to pay me back tomorrow. I was like it is okay as I do not want to be back tomorrow. This man was hoping to get selected as he is unemployed, and he would like the $40 they pay starting on the 11th day of Jury Duty.

I had time today and wanted to capture the three moments. They reflect the human condition in a heartbreaking way. So, will I ignore or walk away next time? I don't know.

 

Follow-up: The last random man got selected for the jury. It is a 2-week criminal trial, and he will get his $40 payday. I am happy for him. I requested to be excused, and I was! I am happy for me.

Been There on That Road!

Since my separation from their dad, both the boys feel extra protective about me. They have said ridiculous statements such as they would take care of me, and I would never have to work. And, that they would build a library for me - not sure if it is a room or a building?! They want me to get back to leisurely reading that I used to enjoy so much and don’t do so anymore.

When making such proclamations, they seem very united. Then, they have opposing views regarding the path their mom gets to choose, moving forward!

ASid is all for his mom meeting someone suitable and starting life fresh. Hans is all about his mom NOT meeting anyone ever! I guess it makes sense. ASid is 23 and independent. Hans is 16 and still quite dependent. Their dad has moved out and moved on. Hans feels the abandonment more so than ASid. If their mom moves on with someone else, where does that leave Hans?!

Luckily, for the boy, he is his mom's priority and reason to be. Also, his mom is happy where she is.

As I am writing this post, I have gone from 1st person to 3rd person and back to 1st person. I feel like that in life too. There is me and there is the mom; but fortunately, we consult with each other. And I realized that the mom is a far superior being than me. On any given day, she has her head on straight. I believe the choices the mom makes work for me too. I am happy where I am.