I guess my annoyance stems from the fact that I have a
child who most people might consider a nerd. ASid does not play sports; is very
academic; loves board games; enjoys strategy games online; reads books, and
engages in conversations with his mom. Luckily for ASid, he does not care about
people's opinions or perceptions of him. Unfortunately, not all kids have his
attitude.
If we do use such words with negative connotations, we
must own them with pride. I remember a conversation with another mom a couple
of years ago. We both remarked at the same time that we have such nerdy boys;
we immediately followed that up with a smile and a statement that "nerds
will rule the world!" In that moment, we embraced the word nerds and made
it OK in our own minds.
Not all kids enjoy sports. As long as kids are engaged
in some activity that makes them happy and creates friendships, that should be
enough. It is best for a child to hang out with other like-minded children than
be pushed to play with children who are in a different mind space.
I know this post is coming across as didactic at this
point in time, perhaps I am writing this for the boys to read a few years from
now! As much as ASid doesn't care, Hans does care so very much. If someone
called him a nerd, he would dwell on it for days and torture himself.
Fortunately, he is able to express his concerns even if it takes a few days and
we are able to do some damage control.
The point of this post is to let the boys know that
they must choose the paths that allow them to be their best selves. They must
not be afraid once they embark on these paths. As long as they are focused on
their goals, success will follow. Words uttered here and there are of very
little consequence!
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