Recently, I was at ASid’s place to help him with some plumbing issues. I called the plumbing services that I used in the past. In a not so strange coincidence, the guy who arrived was the same guy who did some work in my apartment a year ago. I was delighted to see him and reminisced about the last time I saw him.
When the guy had to step out to gather some tools, ASid commented that it came across as I was blatantly flirting with the guy. Needless to say, I was appalled. Why would I flirt with a plumber in front of my grown son? I was just letting the guy know that he was good at his job and that I was happy to see him again. I wondered if ASid would have jumped to the same conclusion if the plumber had been a woman?! Without skipping a beat, my son told me that it could be perceived as flirting by both a man and a woman, and everyone in between.
This was news to me.
As usual, I went into defensive mode. This is how I talk to people all the time. I like to focus on the positive things. I want people to know about how good they are and what a difference they make in this world, maybe mostly my world. And my world matters!
After the plumber came back, I barely said a word. After he left, I pointed that out to ASid, and he said that it would totally have been okay to comment on the guy’s work!
All of it got me thinking and it also got me a little paranoid. How many people in my life have thought or think that I was/am flirting with them?
It doesn’t matter. I am who I am. This is the way I talk. I know I am not flirting. People who know me know that! People who don’t know me are those people I see when an appliance breaks down or a drain gets clogged. They need to know I appreciate them. If they take it the wrong way, that’s their problem.
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