Another New Beginning

Hans and I, along with my parents and my nephew RoV, dropped off the keys/fobs/laundry card at the management office today. We moved into the building on November 1, 2022, under not so happy circumstances. It was a challenging time for Hans then! It took him a while to warm up to our apartment and consider it his home. In all honesty and fairness, it took me a while as well. And even towards the end, I continued to complain about the laundry situation.

Yet, I got emotional as I handed the stuff back to the same lady who welcomed me with a warm hug 3 years and 9 months ago. I realized that I was going to miss the home I built together with Hans. That was the place that made us who we are today - strong, independent and happy. I became a contract teacher while I was there, and I was also able to submit a resignation and pursue jobs closer to our new home. And Hans got through high school and got accepted at a university in a program of his choice. We did not simply survive … we lived!

As we start a new chapter in our lives, I just wanted to take a moment and bid a fond farewell to our home that was.

Pepper

My birthday is in 3 days (more on that in another post if I am inspired at some point) and I decided to get out, hop on a bus, and order food for dinner on the 13^th, from one of my favourite restaurants - Pepper - its real name.

Almost 2 years ago, when I started working at my former school, I realized soon enough that the bus ride home was tedious. So, apart from playing Candy Crush and writing *pointless* posts some days, I started making a list of all the restaurants I saw on my way home. I decided to get off the bus on Fridays at different restaurants and get some take-out and try different cuisines. Pepper was perhaps one of the first I tried. I found the food tasty and reasonably priced, and Hans did not complain. That was a bonus.

When I went back a second time, the man behind the counter remembered to double bag my order because he remembered that I take the bus and I had requested for it the last time I was there. I immediately complimented him on his customer service. We started talking and I found out that he was one of the three owners of Pepper. Since then, I also did dine-in with Lady A, Manda, Neil, IB and others, and got to know another one of the owners as well.

A couple of times I let the 2 owners know that I love their restaurant so much that I would be happy to invest in a 2^nd restaurant with them and the third owner (whom I saw briefly just once). Still, I believed in the three of them. Pepper became the restaurant that I got the most take-out from in the last 20-odd months.

Today, when I got there, the third and lesser-known owner greeted me. I asked him about the other 2 and he said they should be back in about 20 minutes and I could wait for them. I was okay to wait as I wanted to say a goodbye as I am in the process of moving both home and work to a neighbourhood that is nowhere near Pepper. As I waited, it felt like an opportunity to get to know the third owner better. I shared with him how Pepper opened on my 50^th birthday and how I ordered food for my 51^st birthday from Pepper and how I would like to commemorate their anniversary as I celebrate getting older each year!

As I chatted away, one of the other 2 owners came back. I reminded him about me wanting to invest in the next restaurant they open and expressed my sorrow about not being able to see them all as much as I did in the past. He asked me where I was moving and in the most wonderful coincidence, he shared that they are opening their 2^nd restaurant in the neighbourhood I was moving into! And it is scheduled to open on the 13^th.

I have said several times since January that 2026 is my year. And at no time did I believe that as much as I did when I heard about the next location of Pepper being within walking distance to my next home!

Another School-Year-End Reflection

At the beginning of the 2025-2026 school year, I spent some time ranting a bit about Michael. The last few weeks of school, he started a countdown to the Summer Break. That also served as my quiet countdown to the day I didn’t have to work with him! The week before the last week, I was ready to scream at him and ask him to get out of my classroom. It took a lot from me not do that. It had been such an ordeal to work with someone who did not do the job he signed up for!

However, Michael did so much outside of the classroom. He partnered with a teacher to raise funds for Terry Fox. He coached flag football. He ran the boys club. He signed up for Jays Care. He accompanied the grade 6s on their 3-day grad trip. He got several shout-outs in the staff weekly. For everyone outside of the classroom, this man was a hero!

As already mentioned here or maybe elsewhere, I felt like a single mom, at work as well, in my classroom. I was doing the job of Michael as well as mine, and there were days I felt like I did a terrible job. Looking back, I still feel like I could have done better if only I had some support from Michael. Of course, it is a moot point now.

So, it was rather strange the way it ended between Michael and me. On the last day of work, the ISP team, including Michael, gifted me chocolates, flowers and an artwork by the students from both the classrooms. I will forever cherish the art. The other 2 did not make any sense for me. Even as I am writing this, the 2-dozen light pink and dark pink roses are withering away, in a vase, on my dining table. Alright, I will take a break from that rant.

So, what was the strange ending? Usually, when the last bell of the school day rang, Michael would take off unless he had the boys club or Jays Care to run. That last day, he had none of those. He wanted to know if I needed a ride. Again, it made no sense as I was trying to clean up and pack up, and I still had stuff everywhere. So, I told him just that and went to the school office to return my keys and other things before the principal left for the day. By the time I got there, she had already left, and I took my time handing off the paperwork to the office administrator.

I was surprised to see Michael still in the classroom when I got back. He looked visibly emotional. He took off his glasses, and I could see tears in his eyes. He had something in his hand, and before he gave it to me, he told me that the previous 2 school years were hard on him and he almost gave up on his job. He proceeded to declare that this school year, he found joy in his job and loved coming to work. He ended by saying that I was the best teacher he worked with. I really wanted to let him know that was only because I did all his work for him, but I stayed quiet. And then, Micheal looked at the object he was holding in his hand, and read what was on it.

 

Sometimes you forget that you are AWESOME. So, this is your reminder.

Then he gave it to me, hugged me, and kissed me on my forehead, and cried some more. I was quite literally left speechless. I weirdly felt guilty for ranting about this man.

Should that one moment in time erase all the frustration and stress I felt for almost 10 months? I am conflicted!

Commencement and Reflections

I don’t see Craigley much anymore. I barely even communicate with him. However, we are bound to be together for certain milestone celebrations of the boys and today was one of those special days. We were together to attend Hans’ graduation ceremony.

When there are 2 tickets; by default, the 2 parents get to attend … for better or for worse!

Hans and I were ready for pickup by 8:30 am. The boy needed to be at the venue by 9, and parents could start lining up at 9:30 for entry and the ceremony was scheduled for 10. Instead of waiting around for 30 minutes, Craigley and I decided to grab coffee. We talked shop and were back at 9:30, and there were already a bunch of parents ahead of us.

That was when I noticed that most of them had tickets in their hands, and I did not have them!

I rarely forget anything. If it is an important event like a trip or something related to the boys, I am extra careful. But I forgot the tickets! We couldn’t go in without them. I totally expected Craigley to explode. So, I was like “you wait here and I will Uber home to get the tickets”. Craigley had just parked the car in a perfect parking spot, and I didn’t want to mess that up. But he turned out to be the voice of reason (for once) as he wondered if he should be waiting there for whatever amount of time while I wait for an Uber to get the tickets. So, he offered to drive. He literally drove like a maniac, and I promised to pay any speeding ticket if he got one.

All through the ride, I kept saying what an idiot I was and how stupid of me to forget what Hans said I needed to safeguard!

We managed to get back at exactly 10 am. Craigley dropped me off and went to find a parking spot. My wonderful mom-teacher friend saved 2 spots for us, and I got to see Hans walk in. Craigley was there about 5 minutes later, and I breathed a sigh of relief. There were so many awards. And finally, the graduates started crossing the podium, and there were 336 of them. Somewhere around 11:30 am, everything came to a stand still as one of the graduates had a seizure!

They called for a doctor, and we all waited anxiously.

While all this was going one, ASid sent a few messages to me. At 10:42, he wrote “I am going to be at the venue at noon”, and at 11:41, he wrote “I’m outside!” … so, I had to tell him that there was a medical emergency, and we were waiting to restart. Then, it hit me that a few people were moving around impatiently and there were a few empty seats as well. So, I got Craigley to go and get ASid.

I was so happy to see the older brother of Hans show up to simply be there to take some pictures and be part of his younger brother’s special day.

Soon after, the seizure situation was resolved, and we were back on track. By the time the ceremony wrapped up, it was way past 1:30 pm. If it were up to Hans and me, we would have lingered until we met our people. But because we felt a sense of obligation for Craigley driving us, we decided to leave without interacting with anyone. We were dropped off at home, and I had lunch with the boys. While we waited for our food, Hans got a bunch of “angry” messages from his friends wondering why he left without taking any group pics. I sent a bunch of notes apologizing to some of my mom friends whom I couldn’t meet. ASid revealed that he got into an argument with his dad.

We all reflected on our various relationships with Craigley. In a way, it was good he couldn’t join us for lunch. We spent our time without any constraints.

Parenthood

I have 9 days left with my babies at work, and I know I sound very unprofessional; but I can’t help it! I am so emotional these days as I am also watching Parenthood which has a character with Asperger’s (which is now part of the Spectrum).

It was at the end of Season 4, in Episode 15, that I realized how much Parenthood is like This Is Us, and how much I like this series as well. It has been said that every story has been told already. However, it is how a story is being told that makes it like we are hearing it for the first time. The biggest difference between my all-time favourite series and Parenthood is that there is a main character with special needs and it is portrayed with an authenticity that I see and experience in my classroom.

I always wonder what would happen to my work kids when they grow up. Would others be kind to them? So, when I watched Episode 18 of Season 5, The Offer, I cried. This was the episode in which Max, the character with Asperger’s, gets bullied on a school trip. Why do kids do that to other kids?

Last Friday, we had a school event, and my students participated in it. Barely a few minutes into it, MyLO had the biggest meltdown. She started crying loudly and she was inconsolable. The thing I try to avoid is my kids having such public displays where both students and teachers alike stop what they are doing and stare. So, I probably rushed MyLO a bit without listening to her, and she almost ended up biting me. Finally, when I got her into a quiet space, she said that she felt ‘pressured’. After a few minutes, she was ready to go back to our classroom.

This is the most I have spent with a set of students - almost 2 school years. So, perhaps, I am more attached to them. I don’t want to leave them; however, I am acutely aware that even if I stay, they will leave me one fine day. Just like I had to let ASid go, and just like I will let Hans go, I would have to let all my students go as well.

I just watched the last episode of Parenthood, and it had this message that life goes on. That’s the message I needed to hear now!

Second Best - Revisited

When Hans was 6 years old, we had a mini talk about the best mom in the world. Today, MyLO said something that made me remember that moment from almost 12 years ago!

MyLO came back to school after being away for 2 days. It was more like 5 days as Friday was a PA Day followed by the weekend. I made a few changes to the classroom over those days she was away, and I was worried as she doesn’t take well to changes. So, to distract her and pacify her, I went to work prepared with her favourite Blue Takis. (I have permission from MyLO’s mother to buy snacks for her.)

As she was eating her snacks, she started rambling on about best moms. I hope I captured what she said as accurately as possible …

 

All kids think their moms are the best moms. We must take all the moms and throw them in the Coliseum and then, we can find out who is the best mom.

I was like “you want to throw your mom in the Coliseum?” and she was like “and you too!” and I was like “I don’t want to be the best mom; I am okay to be the second best mom” and she was like “I want you to fight my mom”!

It was one of the most interesting conversations I ever had with the kiddo, and I felt the need to write about it.

How do these kids think the way they think?

A Side Story: Part4/Update

Last Friday, May 29^th, I was at my future school to meet my future CYW and some of my future students. Since I was in Neil’s neighbourhood, I wondered if he was available for an early dinner; however, he had an after-school event and he was only available for a late dinner.

At dinner, I let Neil know that I had a sore throat and so, he would have to do all the talking. I wanted an update on everything. Neil had recently moved into a condo, and he said he finally feels like he is home again. Then, he said he was also happy in his current relationship. I did not know that the woman Neil was dating the last time I saw him was different from the woman he was seeing currently. I was a little thrown off. That was barely 2 months ago!

Neil wondered if I had ever dated online?! And this was exactly my response:

Never … No … Not yet!

Even as those words were coming out of my mouth, my mind was working overtime. As soon as I said the word “never”, I felt like it sounded judgemental … like I was proud of it. Then, I immediately said “no” because that’s the truth. But I added “not yet” to share that perhaps I wasn’t ready for it now.

Then, I asked Neil to tell me about online dating. After listening to him talk about it, I realized that it requires a lot of courage to put yourself out there. I guess it is harder when one is older. We are painfully aware of our deficiencies. So, why would one go through such an ordeal? Because we don’t want to be lonely.

Well, it sounded like the third time was a charm for Neil. I was happy for my friend. I was glad I reached out to him and got such a positive update. I informed him that the visit to my future school was wonderful, and that I would be in a better place in September. I told him that 2026 is my year. And I joked that it was probably his year too!

While I was looking for my next job, Neil was looking for his next mate. And we both found what we were looking for. That was one of the best updates I had ever exchanged with anyone.