Kicking and Screaming

I did not hear about ‘If I Had Legs, I’d Kick You’ until Rose Byrne won a Golden Globe for her role. Since then, I had wanted to watch the movie and I finally did today. It was available for free on Prime.

The movie was so real to me. I work with children with special needs. I communicate with parents of children with special needs. Their lives are exceptionally challenging and they are incredibly inspiring. I wonder how they do it. That’s why I love my job. Each day, I realize how fortunate I am to have the life I have. And yet, at the beginning of last week, I did not feel so fortunate.

On Monday, a student was moved from his classroom, the other ISP classroom, to my classroom. Obviously, he was not quite ready to move out of a classroom that was his for 2 and a half academic years. It was an unexpected reorg, for both staff and students alike, with just a week and 4 months left in the school year. But parents are powerful and when they advocate for their children, the powers that be bend over backwards to accommodate the parents. This parent that I mentioned a couple of posts ago is beyond upset.

Friday, I received a response to my daily email from this “new” parent. She said thanks and shared that she had felt like she was doing something wrong at home for her child to be behaving badly at school. As things escalated, she felt the need to pull her child out of school. She felt helpless.

After I watched the movie, I had a better sense of this parent’s life. The movie entirely focussed on the daily life of a mother with a child with special needs. Prior to watching the movie, I could only imagine and sympathize. Now, I got to *see* it. And in the movie, the mother is quite privileged, and yet she is drowning. In real life, some parents are underprivileged and labour with no proper supports in place.

The teacher in the other ISP classroom has a child with special needs. So, 24/7, she is surrounded by children with special needs. In some ways, it makes her empathetic to the parents’ plight. In other ways, it also makes her less sympathetic. And this is just my opinion. I feel like there is this feeling that if I can, why can’t you? However, privilege plays a pivotal role. If parents are informed and have access to services and supports, their children tend to do better in the system. When parents are overwhelmed with their personal situations, and are unaware of options, their children struggle, and in turn, they struggle.

Tomorrow, I am in a meeting with this parent, the former teacher, admin and other personnel. The teacher feels like I will be perceived as the good teacher. Although I have already confessed to my hubris, I don’t believe that. I am just an option. And if I don’t make any difference whatsoever, the parent will seek out other options. 

Meanwhile, I am happy that she is kicking and screaming to have doors open for her child and have her voice heard. I want a win for this mother.