Last Friday, May 29th, I was at my future school to meet my
future CYW and some of my future students. Since I was in Neil’s neighbourhood,
I wondered if he was available for an early dinner; however, he had an
after-school event and he was only available for a late dinner.
At dinner, I let Neil know that I had a sore throat and so, he would have to do all the talking. I wanted an update on everything. Neil had recently moved into a condo, and he said he finally feels like he is home again. Then, he said he was also happy in his current relationship. I did not know that the woman Neil was dating the last time I saw him was different from the woman he was seeing currently. I was a little thrown off. That was barely 2 months ago!
Neil wondered if I had ever dated online?! And this was exactly my response:
Never … No … Not yet!
Even as those words were coming out of my mouth, my mind was working overtime. As soon as I said the word “never”, I felt like it sounded judgemental … like I was proud of it. Then, I immediately said “no” because that’s the truth. But I added “not yet” to share that perhaps I wasn’t ready for it now.
Then, I asked Neil to tell me about online dating. After listening to him
talk about it, I realized that it requires a lot of courage to put yourself out
there. I guess it is harder when one is older. We are painfully aware of our
deficiencies. So, why would one go through such an ordeal? Because we
don’t want to be lonely.
Well, it sounded like the third time was a charm for Neil. I was happy for my friend. I was glad I reached out to him and got such a positive update. I informed him that the visit to my future school was wonderful, and that I would be in a better place in September. I told him that 2026 is my year. And I joked that it was probably his year too!
While I was looking for my next job, Neil was looking for his next mate. And we both found what we were looking for. That was one of the best updates I had ever exchanged with anyone.
