Sunday, 4 February 2018

He Said She Said - A Momley Perspective

Just so everyone is clear on this, there is really only "she said" here! That is why it is a Momley perspective.

Here is a timely example of what happens when people are not paying attention to the information being communicated to them.

First of all, some things are super consistent even if there is room for improvement. With me, it is about consistently not answering my phone when Craigley and I are outside. He has complained about it many times. In fact, he likes to narrate a story about how we were at the border coming back from the States, and Craigley was answering questions the Customs officer was asking. In the middle of it all, my phone started ringing and I was totally oblivious to it as I was aptly listening to the back and forth between Craigley and the officer. I did not pay attention to the ringing even when both of them stopped talking and looked at me! That's when Craigley and the guy (not an officer anymore) had a moment. They both smiled at each other like 2 men who belong in a support group where wives ignore calls. Craigley loves to share this story with all men who are also husbands. It somehow strengthens their male bonding.

On a positive note, I always remind Craigley that that particular border crossing was short and sweet thanks mainly to me!

Back to the Present…

Last Friday was a busy day for me and it was also a cold day. Craigley was home early and he insisted on driving me for pickup. I should have been super insistent about walking, but I wasn't and so there is a story to share.

We have an issue with the Parking Lot at Hans' school. There is a plan to close it at pickup time. I am all for it and Craigley, who wasn't aware till that point in time, was against it. We were arguing about the pros and cons of it all and Craigley had to park the car on one of the streets. It just worked out that I needed to stay a bit to hand over some stuff to my friends and Craigley decided to get Hans and walk over to the car and wait for me there. Literally, 5 minutes later, I made my way to the car and it wasn't there! That was when I decided to check my phone and surely enough there was a missed call from Craigley. So, I called him and found out that he had moved the car into the Parking Lot. And he decided the car is faster than me so they will catch up to me in no time. Meanwhile, some parents were wondering why I was at school without Hans and if I needed a ride. It did look a little strange - me walking back home without my child.

Long story short…I walked all the way home and found Craigley fuming in the car in the driveway. I was like my phone died in the cold and there was no way for me to communicate with him. And this was the information I had recently communicated to Craigley - that my phone simply died on me on 2 occasions last month as I was outside in extremely cold temperatures. Somehow this fact was forgotten.

You know how many times I called you and you didn't answer your phone?!

I was like my phone died on me.

Why do things only happen to you?!

I wanted to say why the heck did you move the car in the first place?!

I did not. Instead I asked Hans if he provided guidance to his dad in any way.

Hans and I are creatures of habit and we take the same route back home day in and day out for the last 5 and a half school years with very rare exceptions. If they had followed that route, they would have found me. But Craigley took another route and completely missed me.

When I asked Hans why he did not tell his dad which way to go, he simply stated that he wanted to stay out of it all! I guess that was a wise decision.

The only real reason for writing this post is to share a situation where so much angst could have been avoided if both parties had not tried to accommodate each other in any way. It could have also helped if a certain he had paid a little attention to a certain she who loves to communicate and who is rather reliable with her choices.

It is sad when we set out to help someone and end up making that same someone responsible for ruining it all since it didn't work out the way we planned it.

Hope this narrative makes sense on some level. If the purpose of it is lost in translation, then simply chalk it up to a regular comedy of errors!
 

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