Virtual Offers and Acceptances

A few weeks ago, the Toronto District School Board (TDSB) sent an email to all Occasional Teachers (OTs) to apply for online contract teaching positions at their Virtual Schools. I did not respond as the TDSB hires based on seniority and I am at the bottom of that list as supposedly there are 3000+ OTs floating around Toronto. I have been an OT only since January 2019.

 

Then, on Sunday, Sep 20th, I logged into my TDSB email account to find an email requesting OTs to show their interest in an online teaching opportunity … again! The deadline to respond was set for 4 pm on Sep 20th and the email had been sent the day before, on Saturday, Sep 19th at 12:24 pm. Wow! Business being conducted on a weekend! That reeked of desperation and I decided to apply this time!

 

The email clearly stated the following:

 

"- email offers will start immediately and will conclude on Wednesday, September 23, 2020 at 6:00 PM."

 

That day and time, came and went. I spent a disappointed Thursday wallowing in self-pity. I decided to accept a supply teaching opportunity for Friday and get back to actually working instead of waiting for work. As I logged onto my computer, I found a job offer waiting for me from the TDSB that clearly stated that an "intent to accept or decline this offer via the google link below no later than September 25, 2020 at 12 Noon." That email was sent the night before at 10:47 pm.

 

Obviously, I accepted the offer. I haven't heard anything else from the TDSB since then! This almost feels like "fake news". It is weird not to have any "human contact" - there wasn't even a name on the Google Doc I was sent. All I was required to do was accept or decline by clicking into one of the options provided, and enter my TDSB employee number.

 

This has been one of the strangest experiences of my life. Part of me wants to celebrate and part of me is not so sure!

 

I have decided to wait for a day or two or more … 

 

With friends like these ...

Hans has started watching Friends' reruns lately.

 

Last night, I mentioned to him that we could look at people we know and place them in 1 of the 6 "Friend Types". He immediately wondered what type I was?! I told him that I cannot relate to any of the Friends. His prompt response was a question - "Because they are all good looking?"

 

That hurt a bit, but I retaliated just as swiftly!

 

"Well, I will let you know that I had many admirers!"

 

His comeback, "So people from your country like chubby girls!"

 

"Let me tell you that even in Canada, I had men from various racial and cultural backgrounds interested in me!"

 

His retort, "And you married dad!"

 

I expected Hans to say something about how nice and kind a person I am and that people would naturally be interested in me! But he was like "I am telling you the truth mom!"

 

Where has my sweet boy gone?

 

Before he went to bed, Hans said the following to me:

 

“No one cares about who you are. People only care about how you look. Welcome to the 2000s. Everyone is a bully.”

 

At the end of the day, after Hans reflected on our conversation and came up with that (as an apology or an explanation), it is a sad world my boy lives in.

 

NOT "same old same old"

Today was Hans' first day back to school. I decided to walk with him - I told him it was more for me than for him! So, we did walk together this morning. After he came back home, Hans casually mentioned that he was the loser who walked to school with his mom! That hurt! I quickly asked him if it would have been OK if I had driven him to school?! I only got silence in response.

What's with some kids who don't want to be seen with their parents in the open?!

Last week, Craigley, Hans and I dropped off ASid at Mary's residence. Prior to the drop-off, ASid and I had an argument and I declared that I should stay home, and he could go with his dad and brother. After a bit of silence, followed by a brief exchange of words, ASid insisted that I accompany him. I am glad he did. The 2 of us got to do some grocery shopping after many months and it was a pleasant ride with the 4 of us together. I was also happy to see Mary. She brought back edible gifts for the family from her home country and she was waiting to hand them to me. If I had chosen to stay home in anger and self-pity, I would have missed making some precious memories.

ASid is 19 and still a teenager in some ways, but he seemed to have developed a desire to make me part of his life. Hans is 12 and I guess he is at that age where he wants to break free from the maternal strings attached to him.

If I have learned anything from the pandemic, it is to count my blessings. The boys will go through their own emotional ups and downs while I am going through mine. I must not take words said in the heat of the moment too personally and I must definitely not dwell on one word so it could ruin an entire day!

Manufactured Intelligence

I recently told ASid that I am proud of him for being an independent student and achieving his academic success on his own.

 

Obviously, as parents, Craigley and I made some choices for ASid initially. We chose early French Immersion for him before he turned 5. We also decided to transfer to a French school board for Grade 4, but we moved him back to the TDSB in Grade 5 when he made the request.

 

We never had to help him with homework or prep him for tests. All his failures and successes are his own. We also spent very little money on the boy. The most was for his piano lessons at Yamaha which were very reasonable.

 

ASid will be starting 2nd year of university next week.

 

When I look back on the last 19 years with ASid, I would have to honestly admit that the boy didn’t really need us for school work; however, he recently confided that he needed us on an emotional level and he was glad that we were there for him. By “we”, he meant his family and extended family that includes my parents and my brother.

 

Recently, 2 kids I know are being lauded for their own academic achievements - one was ranked number 1 in a nationwide Math test and the other did well on his SSAT and got accepted into a prestigious program for Grade 7. I was happy for the parents and the children. Then, I also thought about the individual journeys of the 2 kids. The first one is an only child who has had tutors for almost every subject taught at school. Instead of spending money on a private school, his parents spend money on tutors. The second one has a competitive personality. He also has tutors as well as a private school education. It would be tragic if the 2 kids didn’t do well given the advantage their parents’ involvement and wealth provides!

 

In all fairness, some kids fail even with all the support in the world. The kids that do make it with all the support in the world - do they understand and appreciate what they have?

 

Not all of us have the same advantages. I could neither imagine nor afford a private school education for ASid or Hans; however, I searched for the “best” within the public school system and moved into an affluent neighbourhood and took on a superior mortgage! ASid opted to go to a high school with an hour and a half commute, each way, from our home. The neighbourhood eventually played an insignificant role in his academic journey.

 

I guess we lucked out with ASid. I wonder how we will do with Hans?! So far, the boy has been independent with his school work. He got his first C on his last report card. Do I get him a French tutor or do I let him own his failures and successes?! Hans is heading into Grade 7 - an important year where his report card needs to be pristine if he wants to apply to the handful of specialized high school programs that are available to all students within the TDSB.

 

For now, I will leave it to the boy and wait for him to ask for help if he needs it. Of course, I will offer help as necessary.

 

A few years ago, I heard a woman exclaim how intelligent her husband was. Her mother-in-law quietly retorted that the former had no idea how much money was spent on making her husband that intelligent!

 

Kinders in my home

I have been tutoring for 6 weeks now. I started with 3 kids from 3 families and now I have 5 kids from the same 3 families. The parents decided to add the younger siblings. So, for the first time, I am tutoring the JK/SK age group.

 

Initially, I flat out refused. I wasn't sure of my own abilities. Also, I wasn't sure if those kids actually needed any lessons. After 3 weeks of working with the young ones, I can honestly say that distance learning does not work with kindergartners. It will most likely work when a parent or a caregiver is involved in the process and provides adequate support to the child as necessary. Otherwise learning does not occur.

 

I can relate to certain concerns out there that this batch of JK/SK children will not have a strong basic foundation to build on - they had the last school year (which was their first school year) disrupted and they are looking at the upcoming school year wrought with fundamental disagreements and disputes between educators and politicians.

 

ASid recently remarked that he felt “under prepared” for his first year of university. It was strange hearing that phrase from a student who was in an enriched high school program. ASid actually did a few AP (Advancement Placement) exams in his last 2 years of high school and did well on them. They are supposed to be equivalent to first year university courses. However, after meeting some international students, ASid felt that their knowledge of certain subjects was superior to his own. ASid, since then, has been very vocal about wanting to see some changes in how curriculum is being taught in Canadian schools.

 

Maybe people in education should be consulting with first year college and university students across Canada to receive some constructive feedback on high school curriculum.

 

Meanwhile, as a parent who observed Hans participate in distance learning, I found out that it works to an extent with older students. They don’t need as much parental support; however, they don’t have balanced learning outcomes. Hans continued to do well in Math and never got a chance to improve in French. It was disheartening for him to see his first ever C! Now, he has doubts about his preparedness for high school! Thankfully it is 2 years away and hopefully there is time for damage control.

 

I am sure some parents are feeling that way as well - wondering if their children are adequately prepared for the next phase in their academic lives.

 

On that note, I am glad I took on the 2 little ones as my students. I feel like I am making a tiny drop of difference in the vast ocean of education.

 

Perhaps I should be writing “world of education”, but I will stick with my metaphor.

 

Recalling a few embarrassing moments

Why would I want to share embarrassing moments with my kids or anyone? I guess it is an opportunity to connect with peeps that have experienced similar moments, and allow ourselves to have a collective laugh and feel like a member of a team.

 

Today, I got on a TTC bus and my Presto card got declined. I tried a couple of times with the same result. The driver wanted to know if I could perhaps pay with cash. I usually never have cash on me. I didn't even bother to check. I immediately asked him if I could use a credit card. (What the?!) With a sigh of exasperation, the man told me that I could have a free ride and I should reload my card. Although I had a mask on and there were less than half a dozen commuters on the bus, I felt like all eyes were on me and judging me for fare evasion. The driver could have asked me to get off, but he didn't. He was kind. I must focus on that!

 

Over the weekend, I was at Costco after many moons. Being there reminded me of a super embarrassing moment I had at one of their stores. This happened 3 or more years ago. Between G and me, we didn't have a Costco card. Since our trips were usually for school events and only occurred twice a year, I decided to borrow Craigley's card. G and Craigley are from different racial and cultural backgrounds and have nothing in common except perhaps for their receding hairlines. For some reason, I was confident that that should be enough! It worked the first time and the second time, the cashier gently pointed out to me that I must not be using someone else's card. It was an excruciatingly embarrassing moment. I immediately fixed it by gifting G a Costco card. I had to atone for my sin!

 

The final one I wish to share is the very first embarrassing moment that occurred in Canada almost immediately after I landed in 1992. High school was interesting. First of all, I started in October and had a lot to catch up on with my 3 Grade 13 (OAC) courses. Writer's Craft was the most fun. The teacher scheduled 2 movie outings. For the first one, some students were taking the public transit and some were driving themselves. Don’t know how, I ended up with 3 boys in their car. I somehow got separated from the group walking to the bus stop as I wasn't aware of the dual modes of transport. The 3 boys did not know what to do and then, they kindly allowed me to accompany them. If they had asked me to leave, I would have missed the bus for sure. The movie we watched was "The Crying Game". That day, the entire class was sympathetic to me for many reasons. They felt that it was too shocking of a movie for a newcomer to Canada to watch. A few weeks later, we watched "Aladdin" and some of my classmates remarked that it was great that they got a chance to redeem themselves by taking me to a Canadian movie! Now when I look back on it all, the most embarrassing bit was about Aladdin being passed off as a Canadian movie!

 

Those are the three I chose to share here. I am sure the boys, my family, my friends and Craigley can add to the list when they get here sometime in the future. If anyone wonders why I wrote this post, it is really to draw attention to the kindness of people in each of the situations.

 

A bit here and a bit there

For my most recent birthday, quite a few of my friends went all out. My friend Kay started it by driving a bit of a distance to procure a one of a kind cake! On the actual day, C dropped off 3 boxes of ice cream. Another friend had a dozen mini donuts delivered to my home.

 

Hans quietly remarked that it felt like Craigley's birthday was being celebrated a second time!

 

Craigley loves cake, ice cream and desserts. On the other hand, I like anything savoury. Give me tortilla chips with a homemade 7 layer dip, and I am in snack heaven. I will also eat French fries in my sleep and if they are accompanied by hot mustard, I would consider it a dream come true.

 

However, I digress.

 

My parents and my brother are always on track with my birthday gifts. They write the nicest words on an envelope (my parents) or find a card with the nicest words and add some more (my brother). Then, they throw in cash for good measure. My parents hope I use the cash to do some personal shopping. My brother has no such conditions!

 

More so than ever before, I feel lucky to have been born into a family that is as nice as mine.

 

The gifts continued to appear after my birthday. There are 2 notable ones. My friend C decided to buy me a digital voice recorder. She wanted to give me something that could help with my writing. She knows that I have been diagnosed with Palindromic Rheumatism. Today, ASid gave me an iPad.

 

At this point in the post, I will intentionally digress.

 

8 years ago, in May 2012, Craigley got me my first iPad. He had the words "All You Need is Love" engraved at the back of it. Since he is a big-time Beatles' fan, it would make sense to most people. Some may reflect on the irony of those words. However, those words were merely chosen as an inside joke. Craigley worked for BlackBerry at that time and that was the song the company was using to promote the Playbook which was their version of an iPad.

 

It was as if Craigley was comforting himself with the thought that he may have given into temptation, but he didn't sell his soul to the devil in the process.

 

A few hours ago, I unboxed my second iPad. ASid had the following words engraved at the back of it.

 

"If I should leave you

Try to remember the good times"

 

They are lyrics from a song titled "Little Bit of Rain".

 

Recently, ASid and I binge watched a British series that had a beautiful selection of songs play through each episode. Of all the songs we got to listen to, my most favourite was "Little Bit of Rain" and those 2 lines made me a little emotional.

 

The boy remembered.

 

I have received many gifts during my lifetime. The ones I cherish the most are the gifts of Time.

 

A little bit here and a little bit there

Lovely little treasures to revisit in my head